FOR FAMILIES AND SPOUSES
If you are thinking about encouraging a loved one to seek help, or someone you love is coming to The Place, we can offer therapeutic support to families, spouses, and partners through our Family Care Services program.
You may be living with the impact of your partner's mental and behavior heath disorders, including their secrecy and broken trust. You may also have watched your loved one struggle with depression, anxiety, and emotional shutdown. Whatever your story looks like, one thing is certain: You are not overreacting. What you feel matters, and you also deserve care.
Help Someone You Know
If there is someone you care about, and don't know how to start the conversation, let us help guide you. If you need support, we can help you find emotional stability.
HELP FOR PARTNERS, SPOUSES AND FAMILIES
Family Care Services at The Place
Discovering that a partner has been hiding compulsive behaviors can feel like your entire relationship has been upended. You may experience:
- Shock and disbelief
- A constant need to check phones, emails, or accounts
- Sudden waves of anger
- Shame or self-blame, questioning why you’re “not good enough.”
- Fear that trust may never return
- Feelings of abandonment
- Wondering how you “missed it.”
This is not ordinary hurt—this is betrayal trauma. Your nervous system may respond with symptoms similar to other forms of trauma, such as nightmares, intrusive images, hypervigilance, emotional numbness, or sudden panic.
At The Place, we take betrayal trauma seriously. We want you to know:
- You did not cause your loved one’s compulsive behaviors.
- You are not responsible for “curing” their depression or anxiety.
- Your reactions are understandable given your experience.
- You have the right to ask for what you need to feel safe.
Your healing is important on its own, not just as an extension of your loved one’s treatment. The Place offers the Family Care Services program, led by a team of family therapists and betrayal trauma specialists. Through this program, you can receive a personalized treatment plan and schedule, delivered virtually for convenience.
A fee applies for these services, which may be covered by your health insurance plan. Our team will work with you to ensure your care is supportive, practical, and centered on your recovery and well-being.
What To Expect When Your Loved One Comes To The Place
It can be unsettling to send someone you love into residential treatment, even when you know it is the right step. Here is what you can generally expect.
Before intake:
- An admissions team member will gather information and answer your questions about the program, such as how we treat co-occurring depression and anxiety, or how we can ensure safety and other logistics.
- With your loved one’s permission, you may be involved in sharing history and concerns that will help the clinical team understand the full picture.
- You will receive basic information about what his first days will look like and how communication with him will work.
During treatment
- The early part of the stay focuses on stabilization and assessment. Your loved one begins working with their therapist, medical and psychiatric providers, and the other residents.
- There may be a brief, structured period at the start when communication is restricted, so that your loved one can settle in and engage fully in the program. We call this the blackout period, and it lasts for ten days. You will be informed more about this going forward.
- You may select to receive treatment as well. The Place has the Family Care Services program, an excellent team of Marriage and Family therapists, and betrayal trauma specialists who can coordinate a treatment program for you. This program is virtual, and there is a fee for this service that may be covered by your health insurance. The Admissions team can discuss this with you.
- As your loved one's treatment progresses, the team will look for appropriate ways to involve you. This may include scheduled phone calls, family sessions, written exercises, or structured communication plans that are designed to create more safety and clarity, not more chaos.
As discharge approaches
- The clinical team develops an aftercare plan with your loved one that includes ongoing therapy, 12-step support groups, medical follow-up, and boundaries around technology and high-risk situations.
- When appropriate, you may be invited into conversations about expectations, accountability, and what support can realistically look like after they return home.
- You will be encouraged to continue your own healing work, whether or not your loved one continues in his treatment.
- You are not expected to be the treatment team or a caretaker. You are allowed to be the spouse or partner.
How FAMILIES, SPOUSES AND Partners Are Supported: Our Family Care Services Program
Family members, partners, and spouses need their own care, not just updates about the resident's progress. That is why we offer Family Care Services, an optional support path for loved ones. The program includes:
- Educational sessions about betrayal trauma, impulse control, compulsive behavior disorders, depression, anxiety, the recovery process, and pro-dependency
- Individual sessions with an in-house clinician who understands both betrayal trauma and compulsive behavior patterns
- Guidance on boundaries and safety, including how to respond to disclosures, how to approach technology and transparency, and how to discuss what you are and are not willing to live with
- Support around decision making, so you are not forced into quick choices about the relationship, before you are ready
- Resources and referrals for you, the partner, focused, therapeutic support after your loved one discharges
- There is a fee for this service, and this fee may be covered by your health insurance plan.
Participation in Family Care Services is always optional. You can choose the level and timing of involvement that feels right for you. The purpose is to give you clear information, a safe place to process, and tools to make decisions that honor your well-being.
Communication Guidelines
Healthy recovery depends on clear, respectful communication and boundaries. This is true for residents and just as it is true for loved ones.
To protect everyone’s privacy and emotional safety, communication with your loved one during treatment is guided by some simple principles:
- Structure: Phone calls typically happen at set times, for a specific duration of time, rather than at random, so that both you and your loved one can prepare emotionally.
- Purpose: Conversations are most helpful when they focus on the present, safety, and clarity, rather than re-opening old wounds, without any support. When deeper or more painful topics need to be addressed, they are often best handled in or around a family therapy session with a clinician present.
- Permission: We cannot share clinical details about your loved one’s treatment without their consent, but we can often give general updates when the appropriate HIPAA releases are in place.
You will have the chance to discuss any specific communication concerns with the team so that a clear communications plan is in place.
Boundaries You Are Allowed To Have
You are allowed to decide:
- How much contact feels emotionally safe for you during his stay at The Place?
- What topics are you willing or not willing to discuss outside of structured sessions?
- What do you need to consider rebuilding trust over time?
- What do you need to feel safe around finances, living arrangements, technology, and the children?
Setting boundaries is not punishment. It is a way to protect your own well-being and create the conditions where genuine change can happen. We encourage partners and family members to seek their own support through therapy, support groups, or spiritual communities while their loved one is in treatment. You do not have to carry this alone.
For families, friends, partners & significant others
Not everyone in a resident’s life is a spouse or partner. You might be:
- A parent who has watched your child struggle since adolescence
- An adult child of someone who has lived with secrecy for years
- A sibling, close friend, sponsor, mentor, pastor, or employer
You may be torn between compassion and frustration. You may have seen cycles of crisis and promises before. You might be wondering how much to lean in and how much to step back. At The Place, we see you as part of the wider support network. When it is clinically appropriate and when the resident consents, families and supporters may be:
- Included in selected therapeutic calls or resident-initiated calls
- Given guidance about what to expect during and after treatment
- Offered support in setting their own boundaries and expectations
Our role is to help you understand what impulse control and compulsive behavior disorders are, how trauma, depression, and anxiety often fit into the picture, and what realistic recovery can look like. We also help you clarify what is and is not your responsibility, so you can support, without rescuing or enabling.